Day #4 of 21-day lock-down in India, which is only looking like it’s going to be extended. We’re in the midst of a pandemic, an international tragedy, an economic slowdown, a nightmare for the poor, and right now I’m looking at exercises to do in a home workout. I’m looking at how to stay productive throughout the day, but with fucked up sleep cycles like we all must be going through, it’s impossible. It’s impossible to stay positive all through the days when outside, outside where I wish to be is a memory, is a dream, is a hope. Day #4 of lock-down and I’m learning how to do edit a video I did not want to edit, but then what to do with all this time?
I’m experiencing feelings and emotions resurfacing when I stayed away from them for the longest of time by being occupied, by being busy, by being out, by being away, and don’t tell me you’re not thinking of typing a text you wouldn’t want to look at once you’re out of here, we’re all in the same boat, don’t worry.
The whole world is facing withdrawal symptoms and while some are facing because there are no cigarettes available and no daily dose of clubbing, no extensive workload, no long gym session, but most of us, the ones who’re reading this, are having them due to the lack of socializing, as I video call my sister staying in the same city and my friends who’re staying just meters away from me, all we could discuss are thing we’d do after we’re out of here. QUARANTINE. Which is a term I very recently learnt, but now I use it in every insta story of mine, quarantine and this, quarantine and that, but then, what do I do? I’m also making memes and I’ve finished all my books, I’ve watched enough movies to be heavy headed for the rest of my time., so what do I do now?
QUARANTINE, someone jumped from the hospital building after being diagnosed of COVID-19, and thousands of daily wage workers started to walk towards their home state due to the lack of resources, income to stay in a foreign state, we’re all doing crazy things, I, I shaved my beard off. You see, we’re all doing crazy things. Somebody at my disposal has gone on to say how this is not the vacation he wanted, someone I know uploaded a status saying this is all he wants, in my opinion, they’re all wrong, and they’re all right. Because what else is there to do than making the most of it, keeping a tab on how being at home is not the worst thing to happen to someone. Social distancing is the right way to be, and I explain to my parents for the hundredth time in day that how going out without a mask could kill us all, how WhatsApp forwards that imply this is a biological weapon that China has invented is no reason to be frightened more or, less. There are celebrities, political leaders, all gone on record to tell us how we should stay at home , but just yesterday, hundreds of migrant workers fought amongst themselves to get seats on the limited number of buses the Uttar Pradesh administration operated on Saturday to take them back to their lands. But these people are following orders, aren’t they, to stay at home, you first need to be at home.
I promised my co-editor that I would not make this political but sorry bro. This is the most political situation I’ve found myself in. I don’t want to blame this on authorities and I’m not going to mention the number of times I’ve listened and read stories of people who’re travelling from abroad and how they’re not scanned for diseases, and how people might die of hunger before they’re ever diagnosed of Corona. Before you say it, I know the authorities are doing what they can, the billionaires are pooling in their money, how I should donate as well and there’s no way to have total control over a situation like this which is so new in a country like ours. What I want to divert your attention is the mere fact that poverty is not just lack of resources, it is also lack of security which those thousands must have felt in a metropolitan city, it is also lack of being heard since watching Ramayana is far above the priority list than ensuring the poor, it is also lack of being isolated since poverty is not an identity, in our country, it is more of a community.
But then, as I type this, I’ve just finished reading Norwegian Wood by Murakami which I would suggest you to read too. I’ve sat in my living room after 4 months to be exact, I’ve outdid myself on sleeping hours, and I am bonding with my parents over playing ludo and watching Hotstar’s brand new show. This is in complete co-relation with me being overtly sensitive of the poor, I’m staying home, and I’m watching the news, and as I start and end this sentence, someone is 50 steps near their homeland, I wish them luck, and I’m too privileged to say this, but this is to tell them, that I’m sorry.
Your writeups are always immensely sensitive and disturbing to some extent because they raise questions that I’d rather than not answer… and alas sorry is all i have to offer too.